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Thursday, November 16, 2006

Lady of The House

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Today I actually received a telemarketing call & the salesperson asked to speak to “the lady of the house” I’ve been called many things but NEVER a lady!

Speaking of the Lady of The House, congratulations to REP. NANCY PELOSI who was officially named Speaker of the House today!

And further, in the “what a Lady, what a House!” category, Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, opened Parliament this week. This is the one & only day of the year when “Lillibet” really goes to town & wears all the good jewels, furs, robes, etc. Yea, but is she Happy???? She doesn’t look it!

TMZ is reporting that a local Nashville T.V show has recalled an invitation to DELTA BURKE & LESLIE JOURDAN to appear on the show promoting their appearances in TN in "SOUTHERN BAPTIST SISSIES & "SORDID LIVES". For being “too gay!” This is the home of “the Rhinsetone Cowboy” is there anything gayer than that???
If you've never seen the film version of SORDID LIVES I beg you, buy/rent the DVD today...You will LOVE it!

An adorable children’s book called, “AND TANGO MAKES THREE” is causing a ruckus in Illinois. Based on a true story of two penguins from the Central Park Zoo in New York, this is the tale of two male penguins, "Roy & Silo", who are "a little different". Instead of mating with female penguins, they’ve chosen each other. But they so long to be parents, that they actually sit on a small rock they found in an effort to hatch a chick. A zookeeper sees their dilemma & finds an egg for them that needs their nurturing. The egg hatches & they have a little baby girl penguin called “Tango” that they adore! And now the librarian who stocked the book is in hot water & the local school board is demanding that the book be placed on a high shelf & would require parental permission to be read. The Board will not ban it outright, for fear of being sued!

Finally, this from The Huffington Post:

Larry Arnstein: Agenda for the Meeting of the Homosexual Conspiracy, November 15, 20061) Read minutes of previous meeting.
2) Report from Subcommittee On Converting Heterosexuals.
A) Report on recent success with the Evangelical community.
B) Resolution that Evangelicals be advanced to the head of the Target List.
3) Report from Committee on Homosexual Science.
A) Clinical study: Spreading homosexuality like an infectious disease.
Short Coffee Break & Orgy
4) Reconvene Meeting.
5) Proposal to create Committee To Destroy Marriage.
A) Ideas solicited. Vote on proposal. (Volunteers for this committee, if approved, can sign up between now and next meeting.)

6) Report from Subcommittee on Priorities, Homosexual Agenda Committee.
A) Proposal that Scoutmaster Program be moved up from item #9 to
item #7, Priests & Pedophilia Program be moved down from item #4 to
item #12, since there isn't much left to do.
7) Report from Committee to Take Over Government.
A) Tribute to Mark Foley
B) Welcome to Speaker Pelosi. Draft Letter of Instructions to Speaker.
8) Final prayer to Satan, selection of gay bar for after-meeting drinking, methamphetamines, sex.
(Preceding document was provided to by a highly-placed source not authorized to speak for the Homosexual Conspiracy, who insisted on anonymity due to the sensitive nature of the subject.)
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And TheGayGardener’s response to the post:

Was this the secret meeting that was held in QUEENS, New York? Damn! I'm sorry I missed it.
I was in Washington, D.C. at the Conference of the U.S. Council Of Catholic Bishops. Their new "Homosexual Outreach Program" is so helpful! The Church really loves us! They just don't want us to get married, have sex or tell anyone except a "few close family & friends" that we're gay! They also counseled that if we do sin & engage in gay sex we shouldn't receive Communion. The one downer was the warning that we will never find "true human happiness" being homos! I believe them. Those priests seem like such a happy, well-adjusted bunch of guys! I couldn't find a hotel room while in D.C. but former Speaker, DENNY HASTERT let me stay in his guest room. Which was really nice because Denny & his Gay-Roomate-Chief-of Staff had to share a room! I hope I didn't put them out!
Let me know when the next meeting is, Larry!
By: thegaygardener on November 16, 2006 at 08:23pm


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